Never Ever Gonna Hack the Weather
Jul. 2nd, 2023 02:23 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
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I'll admit, this song happened because I heard Taylor Swift's original on the radio and couldn't get the catchy chorus out of my head.
In my version, it's inspired loosely by the account, in James Gleick's book Chaos, of Edward Lorenz's discovery of sensitive dependence on initial conditions in nonlinear systems, and the realization that this effectively rules out technological weather control. Lorenz was famously soft-spoken, but for this song I've retained Taylor Swift's signature snark.
listen to this song
In my version, it's inspired loosely by the account, in James Gleick's book Chaos, of Edward Lorenz's discovery of sensitive dependence on initial conditions in nonlinear systems, and the realization that this effectively rules out technological weather control. Lorenz was famously soft-spoken, but for this song I've retained Taylor Swift's signature snark.
lyrics by Benjamin Newman
ttto: "Never Ever Getting Back Together" by Taylor Swift
( G D Em CD )
/ C G D Em / / / /
Remember when you said we'd make it rain
You said all we need is a big electronic brain
To work out exactly where and when to spread some dust
Way up at the edge of space — but
I guess you aren't listening when I say
There's no way to know exactly what you've changed
Listen, our models only track for like a day
You say: Up the precision; I tell you: It's pointless
Ooooh...
You say we'll get the numbers right, but
Ooooh...
Look guys, I'm telling you, I'm telling you
We are never, ever, ever gonna hack the weather
We are never, ever, ever gonna hack the weather
You go run the numbers, tweak the numbers and you'll see
Why we are never, ever, ever, ever... gonna hack the weather
The atmosphere is just a PDE
Sure, it's non-linear, but how hard can it be?
You say: You can work it out numerically — we tried
Ran the same numbers twice and it looked like they lied
Well, I guess the numbers weren't quite the same
I might have dropped the sixth or seventh decimal place
You say: All you needed was better precision
I say: Sensitive dependence on initial conditions
Ooooh...
We are never, ever, ever gonna hack the weather...
Now we're messing with the climate every day
That doesn't contradict the thing I'm trying to say
It not that we don't have the tech to make the weather change
But the net effect will never be to make it less strange
So, we're warmer, but no closer to the goal
It's a long way from prediction to control
And prediction always tends to go to pieces
In the long term all we know is that the chaos increases
Ooooh...
We are never, ever, ever gonna hack the weather...