One Little Piggy

[bnewman]

Based on Interstellar Pig by William Sleator

lyrics by Benjamin Newman

ttto: "Last Run" by Gwen Knighton

/ Am - G Am / / Dm Am G Am / / / Am G Am - / /

 

Bright is the sunshine and hot is the beach,

Glittering islands lie just out of reach;

Take a swim, pace the floor, bask in the sun some more —

I hate vacationing, I've never been so bored!

What the heck's up with those folks in the place next door?

This boardgame's out of this world!

Hey, Barney, come give it a whirl!

 

/: Dm - Am - / Dm - Am G :/ / Am G Am - / /

 

One little Piggy, that's all —

But cling to it tightly or else you'll lose all!

That's what this game's all about:

If the Piggy is yours when the timer runs out,

Then your planet will prosper, beyond any doubt,

While the losers all perish in shame —

Come on, Barney, it's just a game!

 

Spider and fishman and octopoid blimp;

I play the lizard — hey, this guy's a wimp!

But I hold the Piggy, no sign of the enemy;

Make for my home in the ice-caps of Ja-Ja-Bee;

They catch me easily, time's playing tricks on me,

My planet's erased from the map!

How could I fall for their trap?

 

One little Piggy, so sweet —

To win you must learn how to think on your feet!

This game's like no other I've played,

But I can't help but think this is some masquerade,

Like they're on some mission and they need my aid...

This game is a whole lot of fun!

The next day we play one-on-one...

 

He plays the octopoid, I play the ooze.

Felled by a virus — that's no way to lose!

It's just for fun, you claim, how 'bout another game?

What do they want from me?  Why not say why they came?

How to make sense of these lines in my windowframe?

Scratched by some sailor gone mad —

Did he even know what he had?

 

One little Piggy indeed!

Your gamesmanship almost lives up to your greed!

I'm in just a little too deep —

You gave me this sunburn on purpose, you creep!

I guess you were hoping I'd stay home and sleep,

Then at least I'd be out of your way.

Now this is a game I can play!

 

Out to the island the scratches all lead;

Despite my bad sunburn I've got to succeed.

Hold on tight, all the trip, give my new friends the slip,

Make for the boulder way down at the southern tip.

Under it, there's a box — what's inside? — get a grip!

Wait 'til you're sure you're alone!

Wait 'til you get the thing home!

 

One little Piggy, so small —

A voice in my head and a grinning, pink ball

With one staring alien eye —

So, you're the McGuffin, and they don't know why?

I'm not sure I'm ready, but I have to try:

This time we're playing for real.

I hope that this Piggy won't squeal!

 

I grab my equipment, find somewhere to hide.

The sentient ooze is already inside.

Use my wits, use my guile, combat's just not my style;

Turn my selector dial, shapeshift and wait a while.

Ooze slips out single file, back to Mbridlengile,

Taking the Piggy in tow —

Was I right in letting it go?

 

One little Piggy, all gone,

As the alien ships vanish into the dawn.

I tried to play by the rules,

But this game makes no sense and I think they're all fools,

Chasing that trinket like some precious jewel —

But now that the game is all done,

I wonder who lost and who won...?